Reflection on Love

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Reflection on LoveIn class we talked about the many different kinds of love their can be. Also in our reading on love I found some things that were very true and interesting. I enjoyed reading theorist John Lee's Love Styles. In my reflection on love I am going to go over some of the things I found to be most important and true. And I am going to discuss the types of love I feel are most important.I would say that the ultimate love, if you are not overly obsesses with a person, is the love of God for his people (if one believes in God) and the love of a parent for their child (and especially the mother because she carried the child). These two types of love seem to me to be unconditional types of love. God loves his people unconditionally despite their sins but that does not mean he is not going to punish them. The same is the love of a parent. Usually no matter what their children do they still love them but when they do wrong they still have to be disciplined and punished. And many times, through that discipline and punishment, they show they love. Because if you love your children you will not let them be unruly and uncontrolled. No one should live without any kind of rules and discipline because then there would be chaos. God (in most religions) has a set of rules for his people or his followers. The same logic exists here also. God wants his people to live by a set f rules so there will be order and less chaos in the world. You would call this unconditional love Agape love.The love between two friends- most likely of the same sex- can also be defined as true love. A friend can be closer to a person than some of their own family members. Through time everything grows and so do friendships. But a true platonic friendship means no sexual feelings toward the other person and this is why the type of friendship I am discussing right now usually takes place between two people of the same sex. I have found that often times- at least at the college age and before- but probably even after- when a male and female are friends one usually likes the other or grows to like the other in a way more than friendship. I would say this is the general rule and of course- like with almost every rule- there are exceptions to it. Some female/ male friendships are truly platonic. This love of true friendship with no sexual feelings is called Storge love.


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In my second paragraph I spoke about the ultimate love as long as you are not obsessed with a person- because the ultimate love does not include obsession. I think that almost all- maybe even all types of love- can be taken to the extreme point of obsession. But there is no way to go about making your love grow into obsession. It is not like "oh I spend too much time with that person so now I am obsessed with them." That is not how it works. I think that the person who becomes obsessed with another does so because of a deficiency on their part. Something was not right in their minds in the beginning. And through this relationship that deficiency within them was allowed to grow and develop and show itself. This love is defined as Manic love or Mania. Though this love may be extremely deep I would never define it as true love.It is possible that a manic love can develop through an individual not having enough self esteem. I enjoyed reading about the "Self Concept." It is true that having good self esteem will help you in developing good, positive, and true love relationships in your life. Having good self esteem does a lot for a person.First, having good self esteem allows you the ability to be open and honest with others, both about strengths and weaknesses. In a relationship you definitely need honestly and having good self esteem gives you that ability to be honest and express your true feelings.Second, having good self esteem allows one to feel generally equal towards others. In a relationship one partner needs to feel equal to the other. If you don't feel equal to them you will not treat them fairly and you will not allow them to treat you fairly. If you feel they are better then you, you will allow them to treat you worse than you deserve to be treated. But the same goes if you feel you are better than the other person. Then you will treat that person worse than they deserve to be treated. This situation can go either way, which is why it is best that both partners feel equal toward each other.Third, having good self esteem allows the ability to take responsibility for one's own feelings, ideas, mistakes and failings. This means to me that you need good self esteem so that you have the ability to admit when you are wrong or have done something wrong. This is a very important part of relationships.Fourth, having good self esteem allows for the acceptance of self and others, in strengths and weaknesses. This follows the previous three parts in that in order to accept someone else you must accept yourself. And in order to allow them to accept you must accept yourself first.Fifth, having good self esteem allows one to validate oneself and not expect your partner to validate you. To me this means that you need to know your own worth as a person. Someone else cannot give you self-worth and you should not look to others to do so. Sixth, having good self esteem allows you to have empathy- which they define as a very important skill in relationships. I agree that empathy is important because if you cannot identify and understand your partners feelings and things then you cannot really relate to them- and without being able to relate you either have no real relationship or it is soon to crumble.Seventh, and last but not least, having good self esteem allow you to have separateness and interdependence, as opposed to fusion and dependence. If you have good self esteem then you know that you can survive and live and function without your partner. You can function with them, and may enjoy "functioning" with them, but at the same time you know you can do so without them. If there is fusion than one cannot function without the other and this can only lead to disaster.Love is a very complicated issue and subject, but there are some basic things everyone should know and have - and if these things are there / exist within the two people involved than the relationship can grow and prosper. Please note that this sample paper on Reflection on Love is for your review only. In order to eliminate any of the plagiarism issues, it is highly recommended that you do not use it for you own writing purposes. In case you experience difficulties with writing a well structured and accurately composed paper on Reflection on Love, we are here to assist you. Your persuasive essay on Reflection on Love will be written from scratch, so you do not have to worry about its originality.


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