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Our staff of freelance writers includes over 120 experts proficient in ozzy rules!, therefore you can rest assured that your assignment will be handled by only top rated specialists. Order your ozzy rules! paper at affordable prices !A Blizzard of Ozz blew through the Greensboro Coliseum on Friday,
May 17, as a stop on Ozzy Osbourne's "Retirement Sucks" tour. The
opening acts were Sepultura and Type-O-Negative, both of whom,
incidentally, had contributed a track to last year's Black Sabbath
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tribute, "Nativity in Black." I can't say much about either band.
Sepultra was a wall of noise; Type-O was also noisy, but at least
we could distinguish between the instruments. Neither made an
impression. Approximately ninety minutes into the evening, two
giant video screens came to life. Ozzy began his show with a
hilarious series of short clips from film and television, with him
digitally superimposed upon each a la FORREST GUMP.
In order, the Madman took a seat at a bus stop and told Forrest
Gump to "get the fuck out of here," snapped his fingers in the
opening credits to "The Addams Family," "vogued" with Madonna in a
music video, got on stage in a white jumpsuit with Elvis, threw
women's underwear at and lit a joint with Bill Clinton, performed
as the fifth Beatle on "The Ed Sullivan Show", visited an animated
men's room where Beavis and Butthead were "in disposed," stretched
and dropped his drawers with Cindy Crawford in an exercise video,
and, for the big finish, wailed along as one of the Four Tenors.
Luciano, Placido, Jose, and Ozzy. You got it. The audience was
roaring with laughter as a second set of clips followed, these
detailing the History of Ozz. We saw a little of everything:
photos, clippings, concert footage, and music videos. Even a
reference to The Bat.
After the movies finished, the curtains came down and the madness
began. Ozzy and his band appeared on a minimally-decorated stage.
(Two large video screens, one on each side of the drummer, and that
was about it. No adorned thrones or costumed dwarfs, etc. etc.)
Before playing, Ozzy outlined the "rules" of the show. (There were
none. He encouraged everyone to "go fucking crazy" and "do what
the fuck you want!") The band started into the classic Sab song
"Paranoid" and followed with "I Don't Know." (After the latter,
Ozzy noted that "retirement fucking sucks big time.") We sang
along with "Goodbye to Romance" and watched the accompanying music
video to "Perry Mason," a track from "Ozzmosis." Somewhere in
there, the Madman also ditched his shirt and dropped his drawers.
Ozzy's voice was cracking throughout "Flying High Again." He
sounded good on "I Just Want You" (another "Ozzmosis" track), but
he went sour, again, on "I Don't Want to Change the World." (His
voice would come and go through the rest of the evening. The other
band members sounded fine. The drummer was mixed the best.)
The Madman continued to talk to the audience, shouting "fuck you"
and spraying them with a pair of water cannons. Those guys stayed
soaked for the entire concert, security staff included. One
enthusiastic fan somehow climbed on stage during "Suicide Solution"
and danced with the Ozz man before being peacefully led off stage.
(Actually, we saw more than a *few* patrons receive a "personal
escort" that evening.) Ozzy also took his customary break during
that song. The band jammed for a while and we heard snippets of
"Symptom of the Universe" and "Believer" before Ozzy returned to
finish the last verse of "Suicide Solution." (After which he
commented on the likelihood of a Black Sabbath reunion. His
answer: "it ain't gonna happen.") Somewhere in there-- somewhere
in the first half-- we also heard (and sang along to) "No More
Tears," but I don't remember where.
The tireless singer waited for the audience to roar some more--
said roaring often accompanied by the tossing of cups and other
debris -- before starting into a set of Sab songs. (He called it
his own "personal tribute.") We were treated to near-complete
renditions of "Sabbath Bloody Sabbath," "Iron Man," "Sweetleaf,"
and "Children of the Grave." On the latter, guitarist Joe Holmes
replicated some of Randy Rhodes' famous, wicked tones. During the
introduction to "Mr. Crowley," Ozzy asked to see our cigarette
lighters. (I proudly displayed my fire-safe flashlight.) The
final, non-encore song was "Crazy Train." Ozzy whooped and
hollered and promised that the "craziest fucking fan" would get to
go backstage. (I don't think it happened. The craziest thing that
*we* saw was a female fan who flashed the video camera.) Curiously,
footage of Ozzy's famous dead-guitarist was played behind Holmes as
he was playing the famous solo. Hmmmm. Also during the song, Ozzy
threw a bucket of water at the drummer. I guess it was his turn.
The one and only encore was comprised of two songs: "Mama, I'm
Coming Home," with everybody standing up and singing, and, of
course, "Bark at the Moon." Ha ha ha. When finished, Ozzy and his
band took their bows, told us again how much they loved us, and
walked off the stage. After a few minutes, the house lights came
up and we wandered back to our cars. Some of us ended up at nearby
service stations, for refilling, refueling, and the redistribution
of previously consumed beverages. We had stopped at the Texaco on
Elm-Eugene St., where a young man with blue hair identified me as a
fellow fan. (I think it was my Spinal Tap tee or, perhaps, because
I was encouraging everyone in the store to "stand up!") He also
enjoyed the show and, now, was proudly on his way to a "rave." We
declined his offer to join.
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